Of Billionaires And Beds

They were fighting about it like little children. There was some legal stuff involved which we didn’t understand, but the crux of the dispute was whether or not Sergey should have a California King Size bed in the jet. Eric Schmidt had to make the decision: “Sergey, you can have whatever bed you want in your room; Larry, you can have whatever kind of bed you want in your bedroom. Let’s move on.”

There’s more-and it’s appallingly puerile! Schmidt referred to the corporate jet as a “party plane” in legal documents. Larry and Sergey wanted things like hammocks and cocktail lounges in the jet. And also nubile young women feeding them grapes!! No, we made up that one!!
Now every billionaire loves fun and has whims, but tch, tch: inseparable pals bickering over beds. And letting the tasteless news spill out onto searchable pages.

Pod Potato

We’re bored to death with news that links iPods to well-known international figures: they all own one of course, and there’s one bit here about someone preferring pink pods and one bit there about someone using the damn thing while taking a crapper. Even then, it’s our solemn duty to report.

This one’s about one Lazy Luddite Lad called Justin Timberlake. He’s so lazy, he can’t download music onto his pod. He doesn’t know how to. So he asks his cousin to do it for him.

Acceptable: (a) Indolence; (b) Learning Disability; (c) Being techno-challenged. Unacceptable: (a) Inability to handle music while being a pop superstar;(b) Needing the help of a woman (aforementioned cousin).

But you’ve got to hand it to him for having revealed he can’t do what even Blonde Bimbo Britney probably can.

Geek Goddesses
Splashed in much of the news this month was the IT Screen Goddesses Calendar. Here’s an in-exclusive report. The calendar features women from the IT industry (yes, there are some) posing sexily. You’ll see female GMs and service centre managers posing as the bikini-clad Ursula Andress in a certain James Bond movie, and as the enticing Mena Suvari in the rose-petal scene from American Beauty.

Spot the odd word out: “sexy,” “bikini,” “provocative,” “sensuous,” “information technology.” The prize: the aforementioned calendar! (No, we’re kidding. It would cost us $19.95 at www.itgoddess.info, and we can’t afford it.) Anyway, if you guessed “IT”, you’re right. The idea is, the women who posed for the calendar did so with the noble intention of shaking off the industry’s geeky image, and encouraging young women to consider careers in computing.

“Statistics show us that one of the biggest barriers to entry is the perception of the industry,” said one of those who posed. You can guess all the rest: (whine) “Why don’t women get into IT?” (moan) “There’s a lack of female talent in the industry!” (grrr)
“It’s a man’s world!”

Forget the digs, and what you have is some people trying to promote IT and computers as not geeky. Are we cranially challenged, or may we ask what, then, is geeky?

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